Catching up

[Murfreesboro]

It's always such a delight to hear from you, HH, and what news! That photo is beautiful. Thanks for sharing it.

And your trip! When you first said "cruise," my mind went to the Caribbean. But you all are doing a Mediterranean cruise! Wow! Can I come?

I have no definite vacation plans this year. I'm thinking something modest, either Charleston/Savannah, or Mississippi to New Orleans. I've never really shown off my native state to my kids, and I'd like to do that, but much depends on their increasingly complex schedules. My daughter is leaning more toward the Charleston/Savannah jaunt, and that would please me, too. We'll see. Neither trip is a huge stretch from middle TN.

Otherwise, we've just been rocking along, same old same old. I'm trying to get serious about spring cleaning and decluttering.

[TheHeadlessHorseman]

Thanks Murf! I appreciate it. How are your kids doing? Did your older son find a way to stay in Chicago?

As for my grandaunt, I only hope that she is still around in 10 years so that little girl can get to know her the way that the rest of us have had the pleasure to. When we go to her birthday celebration we expect it to be a very large gathering, as most of my mother's side of the family is going to be there.

My aunt and uncle have told me that they have already booked a beautiful outdoor venue for the celebration, and that they want to get a photo of everybody standing outside together so that there is five generations in one photo. It's going to be a beautiful moment, and we are looking forward to it.

Regarding the trip, we would love to have you join us Murf, and there is a possibility that a spot could open up by then. With 16 people going we know that things could change, the plane tickets are not a issue, if someone can't make the trip they will refund us, but the agent for the cruise told us that if someone can't make it we have to let them know at least 1 week in advance so that they can fill the spots or we will get hit with some pricey fees for a last minute cancellation. So who knows how it will go?

Believe me, I know what you mean by trying to get everybody's schedule on the same page for a trip. We originally wanted to give the trip to my mother last July for her birthday, but we couldn't do it until the end of the year, and even that was a headache. I know that not everybody has the freedom to choose their schedule the way we can, especially if you work for someone else, my younger sister's husband wont be coming with us for that same reason, but thankfully everybody else will be going.

A few days after we surprised my mother with the trip, she pulled me aside and asked if we could afford it, I told her not to worry about it, and that she deserves something good in her life to make up for how rough things were for us when we were younger, she told me that she already has something good in her life, her family, and we already make her happy. It was a very emotional moment, and I could tell how much it meant to her.

As for the trip, you better believe it was expensive, between the 2 flights, 2 hotel reservations, the cruise, and just general travel expenses for 16 people, I could have bought a luxury car for that price. But do you want to know a secret? From a certain point of view, I practically paid nothing for the trip. Allow me to explain.

I had previously mentioned that in my early 20s I had bought various plots of undeveloped land that at the time I paid very little for, and today are worth up to 20 times what I paid for it. If you recall, at the beginning of September I took a small business trip without my family, I had been contacted by a land developer that wanted to buy one of the plots from me, I could have just signed the contract and sent it by Fed Ex, but I wanted to visit the land one more time before I sold it.

When I bought the land, I thought that one day I would build a home there for the family that I would eventually have, maybe even a farm or something, just to have something to leave for my family. Of course, we know how things turned out, and I'm happy with the way life went. So I sold the land and got a ridiculously high price for it, and I paid for the whole trip, and still have a good chunk of change to put aside. Am I going to miss it? Probably, but I still own more undeveloped land in other places, and I might still get to build that dream home for my family.

The main reason we chose these destinations for the cruise is because my wife's mother's side of the family is from Greece, and she has always wanted to visit her family's ancestral home, and we both have a interest in Greek history and mythology, so it should be awesome. The other destinations are just a bonus for us, the ship will stop at various ports during the week, and I'm sure there are going to be some beautiful places and cultures that we are going to experience and it should be fun.

[Murfreesboro]

I cannot express how happy it makes me to think of this generous gift you are able to share with your loved ones, especially your mom. Well done!

I have no ancestry in the Mediterranean, but I studied Latin for many years, so I feel drawn to that part of the world. My older son, who has traveled to Europe more times than I can count, has spent several vacations in Italy, Spain, and the French riviera. He loves that area. He has told me that he regards Rome as the most European city.

That son is still in Chicago, but his future is up in the air. He loves his location and his social group. What with the cuts in government funding, nobody in academia is assured of the grants that keep things going for them. I don't know if he'll be able to figure out a way to stay much longer, but it seems to me that, in such a diverse city, and with his ability to work remotely, something ought to pan out for him.

My other kids are doing far less glamorous work here in Murfreesboro. One is working a night shift at Walmart, and the other is clerking at a Christian bookstore. I'm grateful they're employed, but wish they seemed to have more direction.

[TheHeadlessHorseman]

I hope that it works out for your son, I'm sure the right opportunity will present itself at the right time for him. It seems absurd that the Gov. would continually reduce the resources that the young people today need to further themselves, their field, and the potentially life altering contributions that they will use to make the world a better place, but I suppose that the people at the top that make the decisions only care about lining their pockets, and making sure to secure their own positions by kissing the right butts above them.

Regarding the trip, I think that Italy is going to be the most interesting place for us, as the history, art, and architecture there is unmatched in their beauty. We will be there for a few days before we board the ship, and I hope that we will get to enjoy the amazing things they have to offer.

I'm just glad that my kids are old enough now to understand, and appreciate this experience, and I hope that it will give them, and everybody going, some great memories that they can always look back on. As I mentioned, we will be boarding the ship on Phoebe's 8th birthday, so I'm sure it will be a day she will always remember.

[Murfreesboro]

When I taught in colleges, I was in the humanities (English), and government grants weren't a big factor for us. But my son is in a STEM field, and the grants pretty much keep things going for them. I get that some of the grants seem to go to frivolous research, and the money might not always be well spent. But what's happening right now is coming across as draconian to the workers in those fields. In one article my son sent me, a prof remarked, "If I have a leak in my plumbing, I don't explode my house."

OTOH, I do get that we urgently need to re-examine government spending. I sometimes wonder how we keep going as a nation with our huge deficits. Already during the first Obama administration, I heard Rush Limbaugh say that, if you started spending one million dollars a day, from the day Jesus Christ was born until that day, you would not yet have spent one trillion dollars. I asked my husband, "Is that true?" It seemed beyond belief to me. So he sat down and did the math. He said, "Yes, it's true." At that time, a person would have spent something like 784 billion dollars, not yet one trillion. When I considered that we were already several trillion dollars in debt, I realized that we will never repay the national debt, because there isn't enough money in the universe to do it. I asked my husband (a poli sci/ government major) how we even keep going with that kind of debt. He said it's because nobody wants us to fail. If we fail, the whole world fails. So everybody keeps propping each other up. It's all a house of cards.

I don't mean to be such a Debbie Downer. I don't know what the answer is for us as a nation. In my heart I feel that a day of reckoning must be coming. Sometimes I think the best advice for everyday people is Voltaire's, "Cultivate your own garden." It sounds like you've been doing a great job of that, and I'm glad you and your extended family will be enjoying the fruits of your labor this summer. Making memories is one of the most important things you can do, especially for children.

[TheHeadlessHorseman]

Man, I apologize for how long this post got. I suggest that you just skip this.

He said it's because nobody wants us to fail. If we fail, the whole world fails. So everybody keeps propping each other up. It's all a house of cards.

Well, your husband is right about that.

By the way, who knew Limbaugh actually had something good to say? Though I'm sure his writing team did the research and he just regurgitated it, as is usually the case for most people in political commentary. Seriously though, I've hardly ever listened to anything he has said, and the few times that I did he came across as whiny, but I'm sure that he did have some good opinions sometimes.

As for the Gov. funding academic fields, I think that one of the main issues is that the people in charge that fund any projects demand results in a unrealistic amount of time, and put unnecessary pressure on people with the constant threat to pull funding, and that can impact the productivity of the projects, as well as the well-being of the people involved.

Sure, you can look at it and say that they are providing the funding, and they obviously want results for what they are spending, but as we discussed before, everybody in our current society expects and demands immediate results, and it spreads across every field and industry, from the military to Hollywood, and to the average person walking down the street, everybody wants instant satisfaction.

The issue with that is that things take time, and nobody has any patience any more. The most important scientific discoveries in human history didn't happen overnight, they took years of research and dedication from people that believed they would make the world a better place.

Look at how Penicillin was created, for as long as modern medicine had been practiced until that point, everybody agreed that mould was seen as a source of germs and infection, and nobody would have ever thought that it could be used for something good, that is until Dr. Alexander Fleming was doing research on Staphylococcus bacteria, and the results of his research led to the creation of the antibiotic that saved countless lives. On the other side of that, they have spent years trying to cure Cancer and other diseases and have had no significant results yet, but that doesn't mean that they won't find the cure one day, it's just going to take time to do it.

I find it both disturbing and hilarious that a college will nurture athletes and encourage them to put their bodies at risk and do everything possible to make sure that they have it easy from a academic standpoint. Yeah, student-athletes don't get paid for participating in college sports, but some are given partial or full athletic scholarships and treated like heroes until they go pro. But if a student wants to do something meaningful and important in the medical or scientific field then they are limited in their resources, and treated without respect just so that athletes can destroy their bodies kicking a ball around.

The same could be said about Hollywood and actors, they waste unimaginable amounts to make movies and pay actors, instead of using the funds to help people. They could eliminate poverty in this world today, where no human being has to suffer, and humanity could begin a new age of prosperity and expand ourselves to be so much more than we are, but every time someone even mentions that we should go to the Moon or Mars and that we could further ourselves as a species, people start complaining that it's too expensive, and it would be too much time and effort, because they will use any excuse possible as long as their athletes and celebrities get paid. They live like kings while the rest of us actually have to work hard and build something for ourselves, which brings me to this...

Voltaire's, "Cultivate your own garden."

This is pure truth, and it made me reflect on my life.

I don't know if I would be where I am today if I didn't go through what I did when I was younger. I've mentioned before about what life was like for us, and I think that by not having everything handed to me like so many people, it made me hungry and aggressive when I had to go out and work at age 13 while everybody else sat around playing video games.

When we were living with my father we had financial security, and aside from treating us like dirt, he wouldn't ever give us anything good, and I don't even mean anything expensive, he would act like getting a $5 toy for us was some sort of monumental event, and he would always swear at us after he got it and make us feel like asking for a $5 toy was something that we should feel bad about, as if it would have ruined him to get it for us. I can remember my mother would buy stuff for us and try to hide it from him, of course my younger siblings would be playing with it in front of him and he knew he didn't give it to us, and then he would go beat my mother for it.

I realize that I'm going into a tangent here, but I guess what I'm trying to say is that when my mother walked out on him we struggled, which led me to go to work at a young age, and taught me not only the importance of family, but responsibility and that working hard for yourself is the only way to get what you want in life, because nobody else is going to give you anything.

When my kids ask me for something it is my absolute pleasure to give it to them, even if I think the show it's from is stupid, or I don't understand it, I know it makes them happy, and that's the only thing that matters. I also feel good when I buy stuff for their friends, I know that some of their parents can't afford to get them some things, and even though they tell me that I don't have to do it, I still do because I was a kid once, and I know what it was like to always be told NO and how that can make a kid feel.

Some people will say that I'm spoiling them, and that by giving them everything they want they won't learn to work for themselves, you know what I say to those people? Go F**K yourself. I have been on the other side of that, I know what it's like to go to bed without dinner, to wear the same clothes every single day because you can't afford new clothes, to live in a cold house in the winter because my mother couldn't pay the heating bill, I know what it's like to suffer. I've already had the hard talk with Sam, and she knows some of the things from my youth, and one day when Phoebe is older I will tell her as well.

I teach my kids to appreciate the things they have in this life, that their parents work hard to give them what we didn't have growing up. I teach them to be considerate, compassionate, and respectful towards everybody, and not to discriminate against anybody. With that said, we also teach them that there are bad people in this world, and that if the situation arises that they have the right to hurt that person to defend themselves.

Along with the businesses and property that we have built, I have made some solid investments, like buying land and through the collectibles I bought when I was working in my teens, some of which I purchased for what was at the time considered expensive, and today sells for insane prices, you would be shocked to know just how much old comics, cards, and toys can go for, especially during the collectible boom of the pandemic. The market has plateaued since then, but at the time if you were selling then you were getting prices unheard of in the industry.

I know that my kids will have security if something was to happen to me, and if I got killed, or died in a accident then the insurance payout would be enough for them to live on until they are grandparents. That is the foundation that I've laid for them. With the responsibility that we teach them, hopefully they become independent and make something for themselves and they won't even need it.

I feel that a day of reckoning must be coming.

Oh, you are absolutely right about that. I think that day will be in about 4 years. I won't delve too far into it, but let's just say that the bridges that are being burned today are going to have some serious repercussions for our nation after the next shift change happens.